So I have this problem, right? I throw things out. Any things, all things, if it's not nailed down there is always a chance it will end up missing. I might eBay it, I might give it to charity, or if I don't see that there's any further use for it, it goes straight in the bin.
This can cause quite a bit of drama. My poor children have lost God only knows how many toys because of my problem. They now know that if they can't find something, it most likely went to "A kid who has less things than they do" or... *cue ominous music* INTO THE FIRE! If you haven't seen Toy Story 3 then you wouldn't be aware of the scene were all of the toys are at the tip and they're heading straight for the furnace. My children now know that this is where toys go to die. Especially McDonalds Happy Meal toys. Because, my God, those stupid fucking things are worth about $0.50 and they insist on keeping EVERY SINGLE ONE. Really? REALLY? You have hundreds of dollars worth of toys and you want to keep the ones that come for free with a cheeseburger? REALLY?
We've also run into trouble when I've absent-mindedly thrown out power cords or chargers, simply because they'd been hanging around for a while, getting on my nerves. Everything should have a home you see, and if it's homeless for too long then one might assume that it needs to go... in the bin... right?
I was thinking to myself, surely there's a name for this? So I turned to the fountain of all knowledge, Google, and I asked,
"what is the opposite of hoarding?"
And Google directed me to the ever-so-intellectual site Wisegeek which provided me with this definition:
The opposite of hoarding might be obsessive-compulsive spartanism. This term seems to have developed on the Internet to describe people who habitually throw possessions out or give them away.
And I thought, well fuck me. I'm owning that shit. I'm not OCD. I'm not a clean freak. I don't have a problem. I'm just an Obsessive Compulsive Spartan baby, don't hold it against me! How badass does that sound? I love it!
|I AM OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE SPARTA!|
Are you a keeper or a tosser?