How to Shop at Aldi

Recently I received the most hilarious text from a friend who had read my post How to Reduce Household Expenditure and decided to give shopping at Aldi a try. As I read the text in fits of giggles, I realised that if you're not a loyal Aldi customer then trying to do a full grocery shop there can seem like quite an obstacle course.

And therefore I bring you...

How to shop at

*NOT A SPONSORED POST!

You're going to need a couple of things, best to make sure you have them BEFORE you leave the house.

Plenty of reusable shopping bags.
They do sell them in store so don't panic if you forget.

A gold coin or a reusable token. If you forget this, you're up the proverbial creek. Although they sell them in store, you have to get through the maze to the checkout, queue up to buy it (or get change) and back out to a trolley, it's not worth the hassle! Alternatively, you can try what my friend did and buy a trolley off a carpark bogan.  

Check out A eyeing off the carpark bogans. Usually when I hit the shops I'm all about the baby wearing, but babygirl is getting so darn big now, so I thought I'd try her in the trolley like a big girl. She loved it, and she suffered far less bumps to the head. 

But, I digress. Now, there isn't always an obvious pattern to the layout of groceries at Aldi, so you need to pay close attention. The sugar and flour aren't with the other baking goods. The stocks aren't near the soups. The mayonnaise is NO WHERE NEAR the sauce. Seriously Aldi, who planned your layout? A blind man? Study each and every item to be sure you don't miss out on any hidden gems. Like these AWESOME Spiderman socks and undies that I grabbed for my boys.

There is no express checkout. I'm all for an act of kindness, and in the right circumstances I will gladly offer you my place if you only have a couple of items. If, however, I have half of my items already on the conveyor belt, one child with a swollen, throbbing hand after I squashed it between the trolley and the booze shelf, and a baby with a dirty nappy, then EVERY MINUTE IS PRECIOUS. In this situation, do not tell me that I should let the guy behind you through because he's just grabbing milk. He knows there is no express line at Aldi, he could have 'just grabbed milk' from Woolworths, so NO, no-one is getting past my loud and stinky trolley, thankyouverymuch!

Aldi conveyor belts operate at lightening speed, so you need to be a Ninja and move your shopping onto the conveyor belt faster than you've ever had to in your life. The operators are also the fastest in all of the supermarkets. Therefore you can't leave any gaps on the conveyor belt. If you're doing a particularly large shop, here's what will happen; 

The conveyor belt will be full. 

Your trolley will still have stuff in it. 

Super fast operator dude will pile up so many groceries that it looks like an episode of Hoarders and he will have no where to move your groceries because your trolley is still by your side FULL OF GROCERIES. 

Yes, I am speaking from experience. 

 Heavy or bulky items must go on the conveyor belt FIRST so that they can go into the trolley first, therefore when placing any heavy or bulky items in your trolley, make sure they remain accessible.

Fragiles (eg eggs) need to go on the conveyor belt LAST so they can go into the trolley last and sit on top of all of your other items. Because, trust me, when operator dude is throwing your items at you at breaknecking pace and in a panic to keep up with him you are frantically flicking them into the trolley then you will lose an entire punnet of blueberries all over the floor. And yes I am again speaking from experience. 

Do not EVER try and fill your reusable shopping bags at the checkout. We regular Aldi shoppers hate this. It holds up the lightening fast queues. You need to throw that shit in your trolley and GET OUT. You can try and pack your bags inside, but if you're mistrusting like me, you might fear that the bogan standing far too close to you intends to put your shopping in their trolley and take off, then place your baby in the boot of your car and bag your groceries there. Because there is nothing wrong with a baby in a car boot.

And just because I love Aldi so much, I'm going to share with you a couple of my favourites.

Mamia Nappies. Ultra absorbent, no leaks, comfortable, and on average $0.20 per nappy

I cannot rave enough about this stuff. The Trimat Sensitive washing powder is something like $5.99 for 1.5kg and it is AWESOME. Our clothes are cleaner, it's gentle on skin for the little ones, I just love it.

My boys love this stuff. At $2.69 for a 4 pack, it is 99% pureed fruit that is delicious when frozen. Some days my kids whine about eating fruit so I hit them up with one of these and everyone is happy. They have a few different flavours to choose from.

And while writing this post, guess what I found? Someone who loves Aldi more than I do!

So tell me, dear reader, have you tried Aldi?
Hate it or rate it?